On the subway, I am sure to keep my wallet out of sight. While walking home, I hold the pointed end of my keys inside my jacket pocket. At night, after I’ve wished sweet dreams to my roommates, I double check that our apartment door is locked. “Who should I fear?” Initially, I think of these simple, habitual acts. I am afraid of potential attack, yes, but ease these fears with precautionary tasks. My deepest fears, my greatest fears, are not as easily mitigated.
When I listen to daily news roundups, read emails regarding the latest in immigration or the environment or a slew of social injustices, talk to clients, friends, and family throughout the day, there is anger, frustration, sadness, shock. There is fear, an overwhelming amount of it, and stories of our neighbors across the globe and close to home consist of insurmountable adversity and tragedy. “Who should I fear?” Recently, it feels the answer is somewhere very near to “everything.”
It’s daunting, is it not? The fear is a dark pit, and at times, I feel I am at the bottom of it. That is, if I let it consume me. Fear obstructs a way out. Fear clouds progress. Fear clouds justice. Fear clouds love. But before and after the asking of this question, we are presented with our answer: “The Lord is my light and my salvation.” We recall who repairs us, who brings us hope, who shows us love and community. For the Lord is there, marching, advocating, holding our hands. When we are united in our light and salvation, there prevails trust in what brings us together rather than what might tear us apart.
Caitlin Wright considers herself an aficionado for all things Jesuit. After graduating from Creighton University (Go Jays!) in 2017 with a degree in English, Spanish, and Legal Studies, Caitlin completed a year of service with the Jesuit Volunteer Corps in Brooklyn, NY. She continues to reside in Brooklyn and works as an immigration counselor at Catholic Migration Services, a not-for-profit organization that provides legal aid to migrants in Brooklyn and Queens. In her free time, Caitlin enjoys going to Broadway shows, singing with the schola at the Church of St. Francis Xavier, and finding the best bagels New York has to offer.