BY SADIE CURTIN | July 13, 2020

Disclaimer: I am privileged; white, educated, employed. I am hurting and I acknowledge my limitations and ability to share solely from my perspective.  This lament is a leap of faith and an attempt at solidarity.  I own its imperfections and shortcomings.  

Hear me, O God.
Hear me through my stream of tears.
Hear me, O God, because this feeling of hopelessness requires I turn to You.
Hear not just me, O God, but all of the angry, tender, tired tears streaming down the faces of many in our little corner of Your universe.
Hear me, O God, and I ask not for a reply, but simply that we may share tears together.
Hear me, Sophia—Wisdom of God—I rely on you to guide my mind, heart, mouth, and hands. 

lament sadness

My tears stream down for reasons beyond my full comprehension…
     I weep because people are murdered—unjustly, brutally.
     I weep because the reason for death is no mystery but one seen at first glance.
     I weep because Black Lives Matter, but are not honored as such.
     I weep because replaceable things seem to hold greater value than irreplaceable human beings.
     I weep because the voices and bodies of Black Americans are far too often silenced and assaulted.
     I weep because hate, bigotry, discrimination, and racism run so deep it seems impossible to change.
     I weep because the family, friends, neighbors, colleagues, and communities of George, Breonna, Ahmaud, and many more are burdened with tears without their consent.  

Sophia, are you weeping too? My heart tells me you are.  I pray to fully trust that You weep as I, and so many, do when injustice ensues; when injustice seems to be the default.  

As I wipe away my tears, I desire a revolution rooted in Your overwhelming love.
I desire to hear the voices of the Black men and women who have been unheard for centuries.
I desire to use my privilege as a tool for advocacy and action, not to perpetuate the problem.
I desire to be called out when my thoughts are self-centered, my words ignorant, or my actions complacent.
I desire to grow in the empathy, kindness, understanding, and patience that the work of solidarity requires of me.
And when I fail, I pray You breathe on me a spirit of persistence and resiliency.  

I believe in a revolution that brings forth a Kin-dom so beautiful it exceeds comprehension.  In the depths of the truest, most beautiful part of my soul You have planted a knowing of what Your love can do.  I listen for a whisper of how you want me to love those who society marginalizes and those wailing in despair as I sit with the aftermath of puffy eyes and a heavy heart.  

Sophia, I admire you and cherish your work in my life.  I rely on your presence to those most in need of your comfort and compassion, as I am limited.  Be with me; be with all in need of You.  For the longings of my heart not fully expressed I pray you hear them.

[Read the companion reflection, Black Lives Matter: A Psalm of Lament and Anger, here.]

2 replies
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    Dean Gray says:

    A very nice psalm and kind of well written indeed apart from a couple of things. It would be better to say ” All Black Lives Matter ” the reason why I say this is due to the fact when people say/write the slogan it’s always associated with only a small percentage that constantly are in the media and have protests mainly those that have had issues with police and never the innocent law abiding citizens especially the little 8 year old girl in Atlanta. You also say they don’t have a voice and are silenced ? This is not true at all if anything they have more of a privilege and are less likely to be deemed offensive to others, watch media or read articles and take a moment to swap black with white/Asian and tell me how it sounds cause it’s not good. You say they have been unheard for centuries ? black people have always been heard ( slaves actually rioted a lot and spoke out it’s not mentioned much and so have many other great black men/women ) it’s just that certain people have the freedom to decide on if they have to listen or not. Like you or a visitor could ignore what I put would I be offended ? No I won’t because I respect that people can choose not forced that is what’s great about the world we live in today comparing to the past. Also this ” Privilege ” you mention , I believe this is a myth due to the fact you are openly admitting that you has an individual ( not race ) is better than most people even me , were you given everything in life ?, didn’t you need to work hard to get where you at today ? was your life so easy and perfect that you never had to worry about anything ? did you grow up in a gated community and didn’t see another minority until college ? you must be one of the lucky ones because I worked,bled and lost a lot to get where I am today and because I’m white all this was because of privilege. Next time I go do a talk or a 1 to 1 I will tell every white child they have a privilege and there life will be so easy and trouble free and then I’ll say to everyone else that you can’t be here due to not having this so called privilege, I would loose all credibility,friends,job and helping the kids. Sounds silly, right ? . Anyway keep up the good work just remember this is my own opinion and is not in anyway to offend the writer or anyone else,so please keep that in mind?

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